$35,000 to $65,000 to be a baby momma from Louisville. (But you can’t have any recent tattoos. No ecstasy use. And start counting your sex partners!)

time-clockBoulevard reports extensively on executive pay at big local employers. But we also look at what folks make down in the trenches — or in the maternity ward. Here’s a help-wanted ad from our favorite Louisville Craigslist section: et cetera.

The job: surrogate mother.

The duties: First and foremost, you gotta get pregnant (duh) through in-vitro fertilization with donated sperm, according to your prospective employer, Family Creations Inc., a fertility clinic in Woodland Hills near Los Angeles. You’ll also have to relocate to one of six states, presumably because there are fewer legal issues there: California, Colorado, Florida, Nevada, Oregon or Texas.

You’ve also got to be OK with carrying twins, “as multiples are very common with this process,” the company says, adding: “Because of the high percentage of multiple pregnancies, surrogates must also be willing to undergo selective reduction.”

Other basic qualifications require you be 21 to 44 years old; have a BMI under 35; not smoke or use drugs; have had at least one easy pregnancy with no complications, and you can’t be getting any kind of government assistance.

Questions to expect on the application form include:

  • Have you ever used a mind-altering drug such as marijuana, cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, LSD or methamphetamines?
  • How many sex partners have you had in your lifetime? How about in the last 12 months? The past 30 days?
  • Have you or your partner tested positive for chlamydia, gonorrhea, or syphilis in the past 12 months?
  • Have you ever been arrested, received a DWI, or been convicted of a felony?
  • Have you received a tattoo or a piercing in the past 12 months?
There’s an informative video!

What it pays: $35,000 to $65,000, the highest compensation in the industry, according to the company. The payment will be made in 10 increments of $3,500 to $6,500. After giving birth, the surrogate will get a lump sum of the balance.

That sounds like a lot until you consider being pregnant is a 24-hour job. Over nine months, that’s about 6,700 hours, in fact. At $35,000, you’d get paid $5.23 an hour, below minimum wage. At $65,000, it would be $9.70.

Family Creations doesn’t say why there’s such a broad pay range. But it’s a fact certain racial groups, including Asians, are in short supply as both surrogates and egg donors. As in every industry, supply and demand rule.

But wait, there’s more!

According to the payments schedule, surrogates also get:

  • an extra $5,000 for a twin pregnancy.
  • a $200 monthly allowance to cover things like transportation to the doctor (whose fees are paid by the parents-to-be), lost wages and postage. (Yes: postage.) But it’s “non-accountable,” which sounds like you can blow it at the craps table across the river at Caesars Horseshoe.
  • $800 for maternity clothes.
  • $500 for house cleaning if your doctor puts you on bed rest.

Interested? Here’s that application form again!

Related: Yes, the city of Louisville registers tattoo artists. And at last count, there were more than 300.

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